What’s better than four years at the University of Chicago? Four years at Chicago plus a year at Hotchkiss.
My response to a dad whose kid is visiting the University of Chicago next week and whose wife is wondering why they should do a PG year at a top 10 prep school like Hotchkiss if they get an offer from Chicago.
Taylor is a post-grad who got full aid plus spending money and plane fare to one of the top 10 prep schools in the country. He was hoping to earn a college scholarship after his PG year, but wasn’t quite good enough. Still, he and his family got what almost every family hopes for – a very top academic D3 school with a list price of $70,000 for less than $5,000/yr. Instead, he’s chosen to go to junior college. This is a problem for his prep school coach, the prep school admissions office, the prep school college counseling office and the prep school itself. The school’s list of college matriculations is nothing short of incredible. That’s why families from around the world are willing to write the check for $65,000/yr. to attend. The school doesn’t hand out full financial aid so kids can go to junior college when they’ve got infinitely better options. The school knows not everyone’s a scholarship athlete. They’re fine with that. But picking a junior college over a top D3 for no good reason is not acceptable, especially when the family told the prep school twice before being accepted that they would take the right D3 offer if they didn’t get a scholarship. Now that the junior college decision has been made, this family has no qualms or guilt and apparently feels no responsibility to the school or others, especially the next kid who wants the same opportunity and now might not get it .
Haley is a freshman star three sport athlete who gets nearly full aid to attend a very good prep school. She’s already one of the most popular and respected students on campus, both with faculty and other students. When her school deal was originally finalized she said she felt a responsibility to live up to what was expected of her. At the end of her highly successful first year, she was very proud of her success. One of the reasons, she said, was the pressure she felt because she knew she wasn’t just trying to achieve her own goals. She also knew she was representing other people and any future girls who wanted the chance she got. She’d been given something great, something she loved, and wanted to live up to it.
I don’t know how much the financial aid form said we can pay. My son filled it out.
This from a dad who wants $50,000 of financial aid for schools that cost $55,000 per year, but who let his 17 year old son fill out the financial aid forms. They applied to five different prep schools. They can’t understand why the boy wasn’t accepted at any of the five, and they’re upset.
These days it’s much more common than it used to be to find kids changing schools multiple times during their high school years. It’s something of an epidemic. I think it’s consistent with the overall mentality of immediate satisfaction in our society today, and it’s not good.
Here’s an email I wrote to some parents whose child must be close to some kind of record for number of schools attended (6 in 3 states), especially for a very good student.
Ron,
For 30 years I’ve guided families through the prep school and college process. It’s my full time job. I get paid to do it. I help families in similar situations every year, and my guidance almost always pays for itself. In your case, I wish I could help, but I can’t.
I’ve watched the highlight videos and I’ve been doing some homework on your situation. The pieces are coming together.
You and your wife are friendly, highly educated people. I’ve always enjoyed the conversations you and I have had, but you completely lost your sense of reality on this topic a long time ago. On my website, there’s a section of blogs entitled “Otherwise likeable, intelligent people”. You’ve made the list. If it’s accurate (or even close) that your son has attended six different schools in three different states since he started high school, that’s a huge red flag. It’s so bad in so many ways, I almost don’t know where to start, but here’s where it ends. I’m going to tell you what you don’t want to hear. You’re a problem parent, and that’s holding your son back more than anything else in this equation.
Your son has scholarship level athleticism (although he doesn’t play the game that well). It’s realistic to think he could get a D2 or NAIA offer, and he still might. However, if his academic profile is as you described (3.4 GPA, 1700+ SAT), the much better choice, the smarter choice, is a very good D3 school (a UAA, a NESCAC or similar school) for the next four years. He’d get a great education, have a great basketball experience, and, finally, get some stability.
Given your history, I expect you will choose a JuCo for a year or two, then yet another school after that. I said at the beginning I’d like to help, but I can’t. I’d have to tell college coaches about your son’s history and that they’re asking for trouble if they take him (although they almost assuredly would know it without me telling them). They’d ask me why. I’d tell them the parents are a big problem. Then they’d ask me why I bothered contacting them in the first place, and they’d be right.
Sorry for being blunt. I’ll call you later to discuss.
Thanks.
Mike